Below is the transcript for Season 1, Episode 158 of Freely Written, a podcast by author Susan Quilty:
Welcome to Freely Written, where a simple prompt leads to a little unplanned fiction.
[Light piano music]
Hi, friends! I’m Susan Quilty, and today’s prompt is Donuts with Grownups.
If you’re listening outside of the United States, you may be unfamiliar with the phrase Donuts with Grownups. Even if you’re in the U.S. and don’t have school-aged kids, same thing. So, a quick explanation: Donuts with Grownups is a fairly common school social event where kids can bring a parent or other adult to start the morning with some doughnuts together.
The term is a gender neutral version that is often replacing events like Muffins with Moms for Mother’s Day or Donuts with Dads for Father’s Day. Some people chafe at the change, but I think it’s so much better. Families come in many forms. In my case, my mom died when I was young, and events focused on mothers were really hard for me.
But why is it today’s writing prompt? I don’t know. I have a little plush éclair that sits on my desk. Looking at it made me think of doughnuts, which triggered the Donuts with Grownups thought. And that’s the extent of it.
As always, I picked my prompt, then sat down to write using my Freely Written process, where I write whatever comes up with no planning and very little editing, then record and share the story with you.
If you want to read my carefully planned and edited work, I would love for you to check out my novels. You can learn more at SusanQuilty.com, click the link in the show notes, or look up “Susan Quilty” wherever you buy books. I truly appreciate your support!
And now… today’s story:
Donuts with Grownups
“I don’t know, Livvy.” Malcolm said with a shake of his head, barely suppressing a grin as he studied the flyer he’d been handed.
“You don’t know about doughnuts?” Livvy asked with an eyeroll. But her fleeting look at his face before dropping her gaze to the floor made Malcolm’s heart catch.
“Oh, you know I’m in for doughnuts,” he reassured quickly, watching for the smile that played across her downturned face. “It’s this title I don’t know about… Donuts with Grownups?”
Before Livvy could react, he rushed on, adding, “That’s how they’re spelling doughnuts? Your school? The place where you’re educated is going with d-o-n-u-t-s for doughnuts? Are they paying by the letter? Can’t afford flyers with proper spelling?”
Livvy rolled her eyes again, this time with a laugh. She’d heard this rant from her Uncle Mal before.
“Back in my day…” he began bombastically before stopping at Livvy’s laughter. “Oh, proper spelling is funny, is it? What other shortcuts are they teaching you? Do you still learn the whole alphabet? Do they skip some of the numbers? Who needs to learn about six? Six is a little scaredy-cat number anyway…”
Livvy descended into giggles, releasing the last bit of tension that had built up before nervously handing Malcolm the flyer.
“You know why six was scared, right?” Malcolm pressed on, smiling at Livvy’s laughter.
“Stop!” Livvy gasped between giggles, and Malcolm raised his hands in surrender, not saying another word.
Livvy’s laughter trailed off as she looked at him expectantly.
“Well?”
“Well, what?”
“Aren’t you going to finish the joke?” Livvy prodded. “About why six was scared?”
“Oh, that,” Malcolm said lightly. “Nope, you told me to stop, and that’s the magic word, right? Stop means stop. So, I stopped.”
“Oh, yeah.” Livvy thought about it, pressed her lips together, sighed, then said, “Okay, don’t stop. Tell me the joke. Again.”
“Are you sure?” Malcolm asked, trying for a neutral tone. “Because if I know the joke, and you know the joke, and you don’t want to hear it again, that is totally fine. I have a million jokes. Better jokes. Jokes you haven’t even heard yet.”
They grinned at each other, silently acknowledging the reminder of consent under the teasing. Livvy liked that about her Uncle Mal. How he was careful under the jokes, minding her feelings and letting her decide what was okay.
She tilted her head to one side and patiently asked, “Why was six scared?”
“Because seven eight nine!” Malcolm pumped his fist in the air. “Boom! Nailed it. Like six saw seven ate nine. Just gobbled nine up.”
“Yeah, I got it!” Livvy groaned, but with a happy smile. “You’re not going to tell that at school, though, right?”
Malcolm seemed to consider that carefully.
“No, I won’t tell that joke at school. I will, however, incite a protest over the misspelling of a beloved pastry. I might even make a sign. Put the dough in doughnut! Catchy, right?”
Livvy gave him yet another eye roll but didn’t lose her smile. This was the first school event that Livvy’s mom couldn’t make since her dad died. She knew her mom sometimes couldn’t get out of work, especially now, but being one of the kids without a parent there had put a knot in her stomach. Until her mom had suggested they ask Uncle Mal.
The next morning, Uncle Mal brought Livvy to school and waited with the other adults at the back of the classroom while the teacher took attendance. Boxes of donuts sat on a back table beside two insulated boxes of coffee and a few packs of juice boxes.
“I’m sensing a box theme,” Malcolm muttered to the man next to him as they waited for the teacher to collect dioramas the students had also brought in for a history lesson later in the day. He nodded toward the table of boxed treats, and the other man chuckled.
“When does this shindig get going?” Malcolm asked when the teacher began going through a list of announcements with the students. The other adults were chatting quietly, so he felt it was okay to tune out the teacher’s talk about upcoming school lunches and gym classes.
“Pretty soon,” the other man told him. “They get through the morning routine first. Your first time?”
“Yeah, and I’m ready to say a few things about the name of this thing.” Malcolm was ready to launch into his spelling schtick when the other man cut him off.
“Amen to that. Enough with this PC, gender neutral garbage. I’m a dad. I want to go to a Donuts with Dads event, like I did with my older kids. And my wife can go to Muffins with Moms. But, no, now we have to cater to all that.”
He nodded toward two women talking at the other end of the room, and Malcolm felt a thread of disgust coil through his stomach. Not toward the women, as this man had intended, but toward the intolerance in his words.
Malcolm shifted his gaze around the crowd of adults, a mix of men and women, suddenly wondering if they were all parents or if anyone else was here as a stand-in, like him. He looked across the rows of students and wondered how many of them didn’t have any grownup who could come today.
The teacher clapped her hands and announced it was time for their doughnut break. The kids cheered, but before anyone could move, Malcolm shook his head and said, “I was talking about the spelling, man. You know, this shortened way to spell donuts. Not… that.”
He walked away, toward Livvy with open arms and a broad smile. He gave his niece a high-five, then asked if any of her classmates needed a grownup today. Livvy called over two students, then two more. Soon, Malcolm had the group of kids laughing, and the teacher joined them, bringing along two more students.
As the kids laughed over their doughnuts, the teacher turned to Malcolm with a teasing smile.
“Livvy tells me you have a problem with the name of this event?”
“Just the spelling,” Malcolm said quickly. “And I was mostly kidding. This is a great event for all the kids.”
“I agree. On the spelling, too.” They laughed lightly before she added, “I’m glad you came in today.”
“I am, too,” he said, “for many reasons.”
They shared a lingering smile before she told the class it was time to clean up and say goodbye to their grownups.
“Thanks for coming, Uncle Mal,” Livvy whispered as she hugged him goodbye.
“Thank you for inviting me,” Malcolm answered. And he meant it with all of his heart.
The End
Thanks for listening. That was a bit of a journey. I knew I’d start with my irritation at the modern, or American, spelling of doughnut, which led to working in one of my favorite silly jokes. I didn’t expect the meet-cute with Uncle Mal and the teacher, but why not? It was nice to shift to a sweet moment after touching on the frustration of people who value their “traditions” over change that is more inclusive.
I appreciate your listening and would love for you to read my novels and other books. My website, SusanQuilty.com, also has fun extras like book trivia quizzes and a blog of random thoughts. Check it out when you have the time.
Until next time, try a little free writing of your own. Let go of any planning and see where your imagination takes you.
[Light piano music]
